Tuesday, November 4, 2025

No Children - The Mountain Goats

No Children - The Mountain Goats
2:48
Tallahassee, 2002
Written by John Darnielle

One of the most blackly funny breakup songs ever recorded ("I hope that our few remaining friends / Give up on trying to save us / I hope we come up with a failsafe plot / To piss off the dumb few that forgave us.")  This song feels like it was written by someone drowning in poison and laughing about it. Over a bright, perky piano and upbeat strumming, Darnielle spits apocalyptic nihilism with a grin: "I hope you die / I hope we both die." It's a song about mutual destruction, sung as if it's a jaunty campfire tune. That contrast — the bouncy melody versus the scorched-earth lyrics — is exactly the Mountain Goats' magic trick.  The narrator and his partner are long past reconciliation, reveling in their shared misery like doomed lovers in a cheap motel. "I am drowning / There is no sign of land," he declares, sounding more defiant than defeated. Darnielle's voice strains and cracks, but the delivery is gleeful, an exorcism by singalong.  It's a portrait of broken love at its ugliest and most honest.

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